Knit 2 Par 3

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Panic! At the Knit Out

Em and I went to Knit Out New York today at Union Square Park and almost lost our lives in in a mosh pit of demented acrylic yarn users in pursuit of free needles.

We've been to quite a few of these over the years, and we have a technique for making sure we get all the swag we can as fast as possible. We stand at the furthest south east corner of the park on a wall and take a panoramic view of the happenings. This time we saw the masses were forming in a swarm going clockwise around the event. Our strategy is to always go against the crowd. It involves some upstream elbowing, and stepping on some tootsies, but it's effective.

I was lucky enough to get a picture of the mosh pit forming at the Clover Needles table, above. You can already see the crowding and jostling. We just had to run over to see what the commotion was about. Was the Yarn Harlot early for her appearance? Did Teva Durham just stroll by to say hi? Could it be Amy Singer hoisting the Boobie Flag in one of her pretty Big Girl sweaters? We shoved aside over two Bridge 'n Tunnel sisters wearing matching Martha's Prison Ponchos to find free size 17 clover needles flying out of a box into the overheated, scarf wearing crowd.

To give you some comparison, this is like being in a crowd where someone is throwing #5 fairway woods. These are big, heavy needles - you could use them as tent pegs. And there was so much acrylic yarn in these scarves and ponchos as the crowd grabbed and punched you could hear the garments squeak. Am I a yarn snob? You betcha. Except if it is used in craft items, like golf club covers or this:

In spite of the pushing and shoving, you could see that the mass manufacturers were trying to showcase their more "upscale"yarns. Lion Brand, for example, has put out a line of merino and 13% cashmere wool. It doesn't have the hand of, say, Debbie Bliss Cashmerino which is 12% cashmere, but at the price it would make a nice kids hat or scarf.

Also of interest was the publishers booths, at which I got to thumb through a new Vogue mini-book on gloves and mittens and that aforementioned Big Girls Knits book . I didn't know what to make of a new book called Never Knit Your Man a Sweater (Unless You've Got the Ring!) in which the promotion exhorts you knit small projects so as to "make sure you don't commit more time than he's worth". If asked, I would have suggesed: Never Knit Your Man a Sweater (Unless He'd Wear a Kaffe Fasset Pattern or Else You'll Die of Boredom!).

We did get to see Stephanie McPhee, the Yarn Harlot, as we were leaving and she was getting out of her car behind the stage. She was being filmed and had a crew with her and she looked a little tired. I wanted to yell - Hey Stephanie! Look out for that Mosh Pit!


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think I might have inadvertantly felt up some middle aged ladies at the Clover booth last year.

9/26/2006 09:40:00 PM  

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